Fable: A Cinematic Sucker Punch

WARNING: This post is meant to be entertaining. I hope you can laugh along with me.

As the director, a producer, a contributing writer, and overall core storyteller of the film I am duty-bound to take responsibility for the final product. Actors lacking good direction, a confusing script, shoddy post-production, all of these are on my shoulders. As a filmmaker I have been through some bad reviews in my time, and no film of mine has been so vilified as Fable, and no film so deserving of it as Fable.

The reviewer, Derek the Bard, made a scathing-yet-hilarious video review for his web-series “Chasing the Muse” about a year ago, and recently shared it with me. He got in touch and wanted to create a second review after reading my book “As Above So Below: And Other Unborn Cinema”, where I delve into the making of Fable in several chapters appropriately titled “Anatomy of a Trainwreck”. Using the book and some of our discussions he created a second, equally brutal and equally entertaining review, which I would like to share. 

He is merciless, and you’ll be holding your sides laughing as much as you’ll be covering your mouth in shock at the film-ripping he puts on my movie, but after this review you’ll be loving to hate Fable: Teeth of Beasts along with the rest of us.

Consequently… you can shoot yourself in the cinema-face with the purchase of Fable from Amazon by visiting the “Tragedy” section of this blog, and you can check out the Unborn Cinema book in print or ebook Right Here

Enjoy the review!


What a journey its been. I haven’t been on my blog in awhile, so there are a goodly number of updates to be had. 

I have been in Buffalo for 2 months working as a director, producer, writer, and actor on the film “Binary Samurai” with Aaron Kondziela, Alex McBryde, and Katy Saul. A post-apocalypse cyberpunk film about wasteland warriors, hackers, and a ghost in the machine. It was hot, muggy, and pretty darn uncomfortable in my character’s huge fur coat, but we survived. There should be  a trailer and promo photos up soon. 

After wrapping, in fact the day after wrapping, we got on the road and went to Toronto for the Festival of Fear. It was a brutal show, with no money, very little sleep, and a ton of pressure to make sales. We only pulled in about $1,200, which in the grand scheme of things isn’t a bad haul, but as we’d dropped nearly $3,000 on the show, it was tough at the time. We smuggled about 500 units back across the border, and left the rest with the always amazing Melantha Blackthorne, who is keeping the rest at her place and using them as inventory for sales generated by her own website. The unit recovery made the show much less of a blow to our finances, as we’ve still got the units (paid $1,500 for them) and the show only cost $1,500, so with our sales of $1,200 we didn’t lose too much. Plus it was lots of exposure, and sales are trickling in from all the cards and promotion we did. 

After Toronto we had one last night in Buffalo, then I was on a plane to Atlanta. While there I was able to reconnect with an old friend I hadn’t seen since college, and though I had some business planned that all fell through, so it became an unexpected and amazing week of forced vacation in a kickass city with the best of company. Not long after I hit the road again to St. Louis. 

St. Louis was a blast. We had another show, the StrowlerFest, put on by the musician SJ Tucker, which was 3 days of pagan music and being surrounded by interesting people. I had a vendor table for Dark Roast Releasing, though only ended up selling maybe 10 copies of Fable. Kay Wiley and SJ Tucker are really helping me work to establish the whole ‘mythpunk’ film genre, using their music and some other authors to help get this going. The show was cheap, so we didn’t lose much, but again, the exposure and connections more than made up for it. I was able to meet and cast Bekah Kelso for the role of Hecate of the Crossroads for my upcoming movie Ember Days (also a mythpunk movie), so its a win. 

Now I’m in Seattle in prep on Ember Days and can’t wait to see what’s next.

What is Mythpunk?

Mythpunk refers to “a subgenre of mythic fiction” in which classical folklore and faerie tales get hyperpoetic postmodern makeovers. Coined by author Catherynne M. Valente, the term describes a brand of speculative fiction which starts in folklore and myth and adds elements of postmodern fantastic techniques: urban fantasy, confessional poetry, non-linear storytelling, linguistic calisthenics, worldbuilding, and academic fantasy.